When I swim, more so than any other type of exercise I do (ie, biking and running), I feel like I face a lot of gender bias. I have always tried to make sure that I'm not being overly sensitive to people's reactions to me in the pool, but the last few weeks have made me not want to keep my mouth shut any more.
Part of the problem, I think, is that I'm the fastest person in the pool the majority of the time that I go swimming. This isn't true for biking and running.
I'm starting to get the sense that a lot of people, and especially other women, view me as aggressive when I swim. I touch people's feet to give them a notice that I want to go ahead (this is a typical lap-swim etiquette signal for wanting to pass)**. If people don't stop to let me go ahead after two or three laps -- which is really more than enough time -- I'll swim around them. If I'm swimming around them, I'll always make sure that I pass quickly and safely. I've probably swum laps for more days in my life than I haven't, so I'm very aware of lap swim etiquette.
I've been scolded and told by other (usually female) swimmers that I'm in a communal swim lane, and that we all need to share the lane. I always circle swim if there are more than two swimmers in the lane, and I don't feel like I'm swimming aggressively, so I'm kind of dumbfounded by their reactions. I'm just left to believe that they just want me to swim slower, or that maybe they don't understand the rules of lap swimming as well as I do.
I should also add that I always try very hard to go to the pool when it's not crowded to avoid these interactions, but sometimes the pool is just full.
The reason I think there might be some gender bias in their reactions is that when I see men do the same things I do -- tap people's feet and swim around people -- and they don't get the same feedback and reactions that I get. In fact, when there is a swimmer who is faster than me (so far those have only been male swimmers), they get a lot of praise for their speed. I haven't seen any get scolded.
It's also possible that I am just being sensitive and not seeing it happen, but it's something I've been hyper aware of in the last few weeks. I just am not seeing people react to men doing the same things that I'm doing in the same way people react to me.
There are lots of studies that show that as men get more successful, people like them more, while when women get more successful, people like them less. I am starting to think this might be playing out at the pool for me.
Even if this has nothing to do with gender, no one ever became a better athlete by staying at a steady speed in an effort to please everyone around them. I have goals I'm working towards. I'm going to keep trying to swim faster and faster, and if I need to, letting people know that I need to go ahead of them.
And of course I'll leave you with my favorite ad of all time (I've posted it before), that gets at some of my feelings on this...
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**After sharing a draft of this post with two of my ScriptEd colleagues, I've discovered the foot-touching thing is something that might freak most people out, and that perhaps the people I encounter in the pool don't know this etiquette rule.
I think pool etiquette in NYC pools is awful in general.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, and very interesting topic. I assume you always make sure you are in the designated fast lane. That way if there is any question, you can just point to the sign. If there are slow people in the lane I'm always extremely careful not to swamp them with wake or splash them on flip turns and I definitely don't touch their fee (unless they have really nice feet :) jk). I think only people who have swum competitively know that signal. On the other hand, while I try not to disturb their ability to do their swim, I swim fast and I pass whenever it's safe and I will switch directions at the flags to get around them. I have the explicit goal of getting them to conclude on their own that they should probably be in a slower lane. On rare occasions if there is just one slow swimmer among faster ones, I might politely ask if they would mind changing lanes. I can't remember ever being scolded for swimming too fast and I wonder if I would be if I were a woman. I can't say anyone compliments me either though, except one lifeguard at the Dodge. The other thing is having a regular time. If you are there the same time on the same day every week, I feel like people give you a little more ownership of it. If you show up at someone else's regular time, they resent it more. Anyway, you are an elite swimmer and I feel like that entitles you to some respect in the pool. -WW
ReplyDeleteUgh. Sorry sugarplum, that sucks, especially because you're not doing anything wrong. I agree with Will in that my general goal is to try and get people to realize a) they're in the wrong lane or b) if they insist on pushing off right when I'm coming in for a turn they will get passed. It may be that that translates into me coming across like a jerk to the point where no one says anything and just thinks swear words in their head instead, but whatever.
ReplyDeleteI wonder what would happen if you mention the double standard next time someone says something? Like, "well, these aggressive guy swimmers really set the tone, I'm just taking my cue from them"? Even if not true it could at least redirect your critic's focus - not that you want to be thinking about your duties in the face of outmoded and demeaning gender politics during a nice swim but sounds like you can't get around it anyway. Again, UGH.